First Up...Trusting My Intuition

Intuition for me is allowing myself to trust what my inner self is telling me. Now, I always try to listen to my "gut". But lately, it seems as if they want to talk more and more.

So, how to get out what they want to say?

I turn to tarot.

It's been awhile since I've read tarot, let alone regularly. Heck, I was decent enough to offer readings for donations for the 3-Day-Walk in 2010. After that, I promptly put them down and really haven't done much with them.

Now, there are a few ways to read tarot. You can go with the traditional meanings, you can go with what the pictures say, or you can see what pops into your minds eye based on the "energy" of the card. Or you can do a combination of all three.

I've done the first two options. And even combined those in the past. Heck I've even thrown in some elemental and zodiac-ical readings from the cards before.

But I've never really focused on the energy of the cards. What is the energy, or underlying theme of what the cards are saying. I'm trying to tap into my intution more with the cards.

And being who I am, I'm taking an online-do-it-at-my-own-pace 10 session class on reading intuitively.

After the first lesson, I'm excited to see what the next lessons will bring. And I'm a little surprised at both how easily the cards are coming back, but also how difficult intuitive readings can be.

The journey of accepting to listen to your intuition/inner self isn't necessarily an easy one.

Shadow Work

For the last two weeks, I have been feeling more and more like I'm missing something. I know that it's something I need to work on or deal with. And it feels like each day whatever it is is coming closer. Almost there...

Last week, I hit a boiling over point. That point in which, I said, "No more! I can't keep doing this."

Yes, it's happened. I've hit burn out.

So, when this happens, I start to weed out the excess in my life. What do I need to focus on. What stays.

What goes.

In this current cleaning, I've noticed a few things. First, I've come back to my blog. I need to write. Journal. Get it out. Put my feelings into words and see if that will help me focus on what I really need and want.

So, I listened to Outrageous Openness: Letting the Divine take the Lead by Tosha Silver. It was a good book. Sure it was a little circular and repetitive. But it started me thinking that I need to open up and listen to the path that I wrote before I came into this world. What I wanted to learn in this life. I feel I've filled up my life and time with many important and valuable things. But there's also some things that are no longer suiting me and what I need.

After that, I found another audiobook. Discovering your Soul Signature: A 33-Day Path to Purpose, Passion & Joy by Panache Desai. I'm only on day 3 but still. It's an interesting book about allowing yourself to feel emotions and let them run through you instead of cutting them off, tamping them down or ignoring them completly. By doing this, we allow ourselves to really cast off the excess weight and see what our Soul Signature really is. I don't know if I'll have any epiphanies from this book or not. But it's a great excercise in soul searching.

I have another book. Journey to the Dark Goddess: How to Return to your Soul by Jane Meredith. Sensing a pattern here?

Yep. I apparently need to work on my Shadow Self. What is internal that I don't show to others, or myself.

But I'm still not sure what I need to learn here. It will come. I'm open to it. Letting the Divine in. Letting Higher Powers guide me to what I haven't been allowing to flourish.

It'll be an interesting journey. But I'm positive I'll end up more refreshed, positive and centered.

For now, I'm just enjoying the journey.

Magick Happens When....

Last weekend was fun, fulfilling and just what I needed.

The ladies of my circle and I ended up having a Blessingway for one of our sisters. She is due at the end of December and we wanted to give her an afternoon of pampering, support and love.

Yes, she felt love and support.
Yes, she got some focal points for her delivery room.

But the most amazing thing, that I didn't even think of happened. 

We all ended up with a gift of replenishing, and support.

I needed to give this afternoon to her.
And more imporatantly, I was supported by other sisters in getting things off the ground and definitely wouldn't have been able to do anything if it wasn't for their help.

Others enjoyed the conversation.
Some liked the creative outlet of henna and prayer flags.
Still others, enjoyed the meditation.
And we all loved the feast. 

Having a laid back, structured afternoon with women focusing on support and love is fascinating!

It was an amazing experience to be surrounded by such a wonderful group of women.

As they say, "When women get together, magick happens."

Breathe In. Breathe Out. Repeat.

Sighhhh.

Merry Meet old friend.

This poor blog of mine has become something I don't recognize anymore. Yes, it served it's purpose for the time being. But I think I need a change. A cleaning.

I need to reignite the spark that inspired me to write this. And get back to basics.

Heck, I need to do that in my day to day life as well. Clear out the clutter. Center. Relax. Breathe.

Things that are no longer serving their purpose will be bid a fond farewell. And things that I've been neglecting that I need will be brought back to the forefront.

I feel as though, I've hit a crossroads. Do I turn left? Right? Forward? Back? Only Divine Will can show the true way. I've decided to stop forcing things, and allow for the Universe to guide me where I need to go.

It's time for me to listen.

What is in a Human Voice?

Very insightful commentary. Thought provoking and philosophical.

And of course, an amazing performance.

Deflated

I try to go out of my normal work duties sometimes to try and expand my horizons, network, become more of a team player, etc. And the first year I did, it was AMAZING! Everyone did what they said they'd do. We all split the share of work evenly. It was a perfect alignment of a team.

Last year, wasn't so great. It seemed that the stars weren't as perfectly aligned as the year before. The meetings were more sporadic and no one wanted to do anything.

This year, I wasn't going to help. But someone different was running the show and I figured I'd do it to help her out since I knew her. But now............I feel so deflated.

She asks for help. Then we offer. And before we can do anything it's done already. WTF? Why ask us if you're just going to do it anyway?!?!? I guess I'll just stop offering. Maybe then I won't be so disappointed.

Weekly Obsession: Not Your Mother's Dry Shampoo

Yes, ladies, this is the answer to greasy, second or even third day hair. I LOVE this stuff. It comes out in full force no shaking required.

The only thing I would recommend is to fluff your hair after spraying with your fingers. White powder does cover your hair, so for brunettes, more fluffing may be required. The reason I suggest this is so that your brush doesn't end up looking dusty. Though if you don't care, then by all means.

I do like other products that Not Your Mother's sells, but this product deserves it's own post.

Mid-Week Pick Me Up - Here Comes the Sun (George Harrison)

Finally!!!! It's SPRING!

Enjoy this classic.

Knitting Mondays: Hitchhiker in Pink Orchard

Ok everyone, I know these titles may sound like odd word mash. But it will make sense. I promise.

The first the Hitchhiker. This is a gorgeous shawl(ette) scarf. Whatever you decide to use it as. It ends up as a triangular piece of fabric with 42 "teeth" on it. Just go look at the pic and you'll see what I mean.

42. Anybody? Get it?

If not read through the pattern description and you will find out why 42. And shame on you, you should already know. LOL

The second, Pink Orchard. This (fingering weight AKA: sock weight) is a bright shade of green, pink and white. Seriously, it looks like the dyer (Toil and Trouble on etsy) took a few highlighters and colored it.

Am I right? Well, here's what it looks like so far.

Weekly Obsession: Ostara

Now, I know this is more of a holiday than something to be "obsessing over". However, I am so excited for Ostara this year. For a few reasons.

1. I get to do the "Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Chocolate Rabbit" with a bunch of kids tonight. It's a ton of fun, but be careful the possibility of sugar shock is quite real.

2. I'm presiding over my first ritual for my coven. I'm a little nervous. But I'm confident that I've been trained well. Keep your fingers crossed that I don't end up doing something really silly like light my clothing on fire or drop the eggs. It will be just what it needs to be. (If keep telling myself that, maybe it will actually happen.)

3. Spring is officially here! (I hope.)

What are you all doing to celebrate?

Mid-Week Pick Me Up - Count on Me (Bruno Mars)

This is exactly what friendship is all about.

So for all my friends, this one is for you. 

Knit Mondays - Where It All Begins... Well Continues...

I figure since knitting has become such a big thing for me instead of filling up every Weekly Obsession with it, I might as well give it it's own day.

So for those of you not on Ravelry. If you are a Hooker or Pickers (and Throwers too) (those are knitting nicknames for people based on how they hold their yarn. Yes, there are two. And I am a Picker.) and you aren't on Ravelry. Go now. You will thank me! Free patterns, a library, a place to post pictures of your stash so you always know just what you have. Plus there's forum central for everything from Swaps, Dr. Who, Downton Abbey to just local groups. It's a Yarn Haven for us!

Anywho, some of my latest creations.

The Wildflower Crown: my mom actually had the crocheted flowers. I just sewed them onto the crown.And yes, I will wear this for Beltaine.

A Simple Little Purse I made to learn how to Double Knit. I have the ultimate Double Knit project in mind. But I will have to get infinitely better before I make it. 

A baby blanket for Eleanor. She was born on the 11th. I'm further along than this picture shows. I thought it was a good color for a little girl.

So does anyone here, crochet or knit? 

Weekly Obsessions: RuPaul's Drag Race

Maybe not a weekly obsession. More of an ongoing and ever present obsession.

I just can't get enough of RuPaul and all of her Drag Racers. The transformation from boy/man to stunning glamazon! Amazing!

And if you (& are in the states) want to watch. Go to the show's website here.

Mid-Week Pick Me Up - Titanium (feat Sia) David Guetta

This is how I feel with Winter. You can fire away, I will still be standing and it will soon be over.

Paczki...No I didn't spell that wrong....

WOW! I figured I had definitely covered this topic before and just had to link to it. But apparently in year's past, I was overcome by sugar and just couldn't sit still long enough to write something.

This year, I guess I'll be smart and write it before I imbibe.

What am I talking about you ask? Why all the weird allusions?

As many may know, especially those Catholics among us, that today is Fat Tuesday (the day before Ash Wednesday/ AKA the first day of Lent) The parties from New Orleans might know this a Mardi Gras. And while they celebrate with booze, parades, masquerades, and debauchery....all quite fun, I'm sure. (No judgement here.) We in Michigan (and many other Mid-western states and cities) celebrate Fat Tuesday as Paczki Day.

This is the most awesomest of the food related holidays. Because we eat Paczki's on Paczki Day. And for those trying to say it in your head, the way I say it is "Poonch-key". Also acceptable is "Punch-key." They are the most awesome of filled doughnut-ish confections. They look like a jelly filled doughnut but they are denser due to the egg that is added to the dough. I like the lemon, apple or cream ones the best.

The way I heard it explained is that the Polish brought this celebration before Ash Wednesday with them when they settled here. (And we have a large Polish population in Hamtramck. "Ham-tram-ick" So large, that there are Polish restaurants where they speak Polish and English to serve their customers.

The reason behind the amazing awesomeness of the Paczki is that the devout were using up all the sugar in their house so they wouldn't be tempted to use it during Lent.

If you are enjoying the 2000 calorie treat today, HURRAH to you! Otherwise, (if you still can, *giggle*) have a wonderful day! 

Click to find all the fun things going on near D-Town today and an interview with a Polish Bakery.

*Sigh*

This winter has been really hard on me. Well, to be fair, the last 6 months or so have all been building up to this. But, I have never felt this low.

I've always thought I had SAD, but I figured that I must've gotten over it the last few years, but to be fair, we had an extremely mild winter last year. So, that was obviously wishful thinking on my part.

Anyway, I've always hated February. There's a reason they make it so short. It sucks. There's too much snow, slush, gray, gloom and blah out there.Not to mention the fact that I end up feeling gloomy, gray and blah because of it.

I don't know about any one else, I hope I'm not the only one that has this. Well, we'll see if I'm the fucked up one here or it it's just commonplace.

Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night and can't fall back asleep? And not because you're thinking of all the things you want / need to do the next day, year, week, whatever. No, you're wide awake because your mind is telling you that, you shouldn't have done this or said that. You should have done this, made this, said this. And this is why you don't have, X, Y, Z. Or why you aren't A, B, and C.

Ugh, I just want to get rid of that little voice. And maybe it's always been there. Maybe I'm just more suceptable to it because of all the shit going on.

But I get up, I work out, I go through the motions, hoping that one day soon. The sun will come out, the flowers will bloom and that I'm not really a failure. And maybe, just maybe I'll be able to sleep through the night.

And then in the next instance, I just want to slap myself for even believing the negativity for even a second.

This has to end soon right?!?!?! Spring isn't that far away.....right?!?!?!

That little voice isn't right. Right?!?!?!

2014 Better Get Over Itself

2014 can suck it!

No really.

Suck.

It.

It's only the 13th day of the year and already I just want 2014 to be over. Either that or whatever/whoever/whichever I/the world pissed off, I get it. I'm sorry We're sorry. Please go away! 

Everything starts off okay and full of promise just like every year.Finally get back to work for two days. Then off for the weekend.....or so I thought.

Nope!

Find out on Saturday, that hey, The Hubs now has to spend Monday - Friday at another store a few hours away. (So he will be gone.)

Sunday:
* Squeaker has a fever all day. Finally it breaks at dinner time and he seems to be doing fine.
* the University where I work decided to close for Monday.

Monday:
* The now infamous Polar Vortex known as Winter Storm Ion dropped a shit ton of show on our town. Then decided to follow it up with colder than fuck temperatures not seen in decades.
* Squeaker's fever comes back and he's pissy, whiny and not eating or drinking.
* Turns out he has the flu. Grab medicine and essentials and come back home.

Tuesday:
* Ion decides to keep up the craptastic weather and blows all the snow drifts over our driveway.
* Work closes again. Whew!

Wednesday:
* Work is now open. But....
* Squeaker seems to be doing better.
* I start having a sore throat, aches, sneeze, cough, headache.
* Snowed in.

* I call a Snow Removal company, sure they'll be out this afternoon to clear the drive.
* 1:30, call from Snow Remover, yeah,  can't make it to you today. Call someone else, if you can't get it done today, I'll do it tomorrow. 
* 6 companies later, finally get someone who will come at 7pm. Fine whatever, great, just get here!  Plus he's the cheapest too boot.


Thursday:
* Finally can get out of the house!
* Kids. Are. Going. To. Daycare! Woohoo!!!!
* I go to urgent care. Luckily no flu. I go home and sleep.
* Get kids, we relax. Day 4 was pretty good.

Friday:
* Hubs coming home!
* I'm supposed to be off work, but decide since I didn't go in at all. To put the kids in daycare and go in.
* Hubs gets home around noon.
* I get a call from Urgent Care. Squeaker's has pnemonia. WTF!!!
* Hubs, picks up Squeaker goes to Urgent Care. Gets 2 scrips. Huh?!?
* Pharmacist questions scrips.
* I call Squeaker's doctor's office. Talk to nurse. She says you have to ask the prescribing doc.

Saturday:
* Hubs works ALL DAY! Ugh.
* Doc's office calls back. Yeah, the Urgent Care, isn't affiliated with us and doesn't know that Squeaker has Virally Induced Asthma and that was probably the spot on the x-ray (indicating the pnemonia) So don't ever go back there cause they suck at pediatric care. (Yeah, they were professional about it, I'm just putting my version in.)
* Yay, Squeaker doesn't have pnemonia.
* I'm starting to feel better.

Sunday:
*Relaxation central.

I'm really hoping that all the shit of 2014 is over. At least for a while!