Wednesday, February 2, 2011

The Joys of Laryngitis

Yes, my friends. I have developed laryngitis from this nasty fucking cold. The joys are numerous. To name a few:

* My 2 year old daughter doesn't acknowledge my flailing arms when I'm trying to get her attention. I've reverted to clapping, stomping and slapping walls like a crazy person. And then the only one who comes running, is my husband, who thinks I've had some odd accident.

* Random people whisper back to me. Thinking it's a conspiratorial game of sorts.

* My Mother hangs up on me, thinking my voice issue is due to bad reception. I have to call her back and say, "My voice sucks, don't hang up." really fast, hoping she'll hear and understand me.

* When going to order lunch yesterday, I think. Oh, crap. How can I get food? I have to pathetically ask a (very sweet) co-worker to order my lunch for me.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011


Why is it that:

* When my daughter gets sick, she's sick for a day. While I'm sick for a week?

* When I take a nap, our stupid first response radio alarm thing goes off? And not for anything today. For a weather watch for tomorrow night. How does the weatherman know that far in advance when he can't usually tell me when it's going to rain?

* When I'm sick, I feel guilty for canceling everything?

* When I'm sick, there's nothing but shit on tv. But when I'm healthy, all the good shows and specials are on?

* When I'm sick and can barely talk, my dog acts out more than usual?

* When I'm sick I'm bitchy?